by David Haack, Vice President of Sales & Marketing, Quail Park of Lynnwood
Ask yourself this question, is there someone in your life,
other than immediate familial relations, who you might turn to first for
comfort, advice or to tell a great joke to? If you answered yes to this, then
you probably have a few people in your life that could be considered Family of
Choice. For some people, Family of
Choice is all they have ever known. For instance, if you were orphaned, then
every person you may consider Family could possibly fall into this category.
You may also be or know people who are Lesbian, Gay,
Bisexual or Transgendered, who perhaps prefer their Family of Choice to bloodline
family members due to being ostracized for their sexual orientation or gender
identity. Our world is evolving at a rapid pace, and civil liberty is a core
definition of who we are, and how we see ourselves being, living and loving.
Since starting my mission in Senior Care almost 30 years
ago, one key element has always been my focus, who is this person entrusted to
my care, and how can I make the most beneficial and meaningful impact on their
quality of life? I have learned many things along the way that I feel have made
me better equipped to provide compassionate care:
First off our lens needs to be in tune to the many colors of
the prism. Growing up in an all Caucasian community, often led weight to the
term, “I don’t see people’s color of skin, just the person.” I have since
learned just how limiting that stance can be, as we must see color and
diversity, and recognize the variations in how people view life events and
surroundings. If we are Caucasian by birth, we must remember, that life for us
has more than likely been complimented with heightened privileges, more so than
those of our friends and Family of different color and race origins.
Second, we must learn to be adaptive to specific needs and
challenges that those around us might face, whether it’s sexual orientation,
gender identity, race or religious choices. As we age, we begin to appreciate
with more clarity, these differences and thus become less in tune to our own
ideals and more in tune to how others may perceive our actions and
communication styles. So, when we hear a woman we care for discussing her Life
Partner, we should never make an assumption that she is talking about a
Husband, as she may be talking about her wife. When we hear a gay man state
that his dogs are equivalent to him, as our children are to us, then that is
part of his Family of Choice. All staff at Quail Park have LGBT cultural competency
training through SAGE national Resource Center trainers, and residents will
find the difference in how our contract language recognizes Family of choice
and non-traditional structure.
When looking for options in aging keep one thought in mind…
accept no barriers or roadblocks to your life choices. Do not live out your
golden years with any element of fear of those who provide care, and most
importantly remember--It is your life, and no one else's! Celebrate it and live
it surrounded by the many colors of the spectrum that nature has provided!
Don’t be afraid to alter your lens, laugh as much as possible and cherish those
you love the most, whether two legged or four!
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